Jesus

Another Bengal gets arrested. At the club. For assaulting a police officer. Sigh.

Begin scene:

EXT. THE RED DOOR NIGHTCLUB

A long line of clubgoers winds around the side of the club. Mostly white guys in ugly shirts. A black Escalade rolls onto the scene. REGGIE gets out of the car wearing a neon green Bengals jersey. He approaches the BOUNCER.

REGGIE
Hello, there, my good man! How goes it on this fine night?

BOUNCER
Just fucking chipper, amigo! What can I do for you?

REGGIE
Well, I see this complete bummer of a line,
and I was wondering if there's any way around it . . .

BOUNCER
Shucks, I sure don't think so, pal. Just
wouldn't be fair to all these white guys in
ugly shirts, would it?

REGGIE
Well, I am a member of the Cincinnati Bengals,
if that affiliation "opens any doors," so to speak!

REGGIE winks and elbows the Bouncer suggesively, pleased with his double entendre.

BOUNCER
I don't believe you. You seem way too mild
mannered. You're probably just a Chili's
bartender trying to dupe me.

A uniformed POLICE OFFICER walks by.

REGGIE
Not a Bengal, huh? Why don't you try this on
for size!

Reggie sucker punches the POLICE OFFICER in the stomach as the Bouncer looks on, impressed. Reggie keeps punching until the cop is incapacitated.

BOUNCER
My mistake, Mr. Henry! Please step inside!

END SCENE